The Copper Scrolls
2 days ago
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Skills
My neighbor rang my bell tonight. When I went to the door, he said he needed some help. With his washer. He didn't know where to put anything or what to do and he needed to wash clothes. So, I went over and helped him with that. (He has an amazing washer/dryer. They are computerized, so that's why he was a little clueless.) Then, I had to teach this 22 year old man how to make macaroni and cheese. Seriously. I have met his mom, and she is a nice lady, but she did a huge disservice to her son by not teaching about this stuff!! I wouldn't do anything for him, I just told him what to do and when. He has some tuna helper stuff, and also some pancake mix. I don't know how you could mess this stuff up unless you totally disregard the packaging. But, I don't know if he was ever taught this stuff!! My favorite part was him saying "how do you do this stuff??" as in doing laundry and making food was hard work. Of course, he has to do it with a leg that he would like to have amputated. His leg was blown up, and he can only bend it to about 60 degrees. So, its a little hard to bend over to get things in and out of a washer and dryer.... It kind of made me feel good about the things that I take for granted. And also reminded me that I need to really make sure that I teach my kids these skills. I forget that they are skills. Sometimes I think it is pure drudgery, but this could help me have a better attitude toward housework....that its a skill.
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3 comments:
Hum...interesting point.
I guess, when it comes down to it, we stay-at-home-parents have MAD skills.
Think of all the things we multi-task, organize, manage, and accomplish everyday.
Maybe if we look at the day as we would a job (with no monetary benefits) we would see what exemplory employeers we are.
(Plus you and I both know that many moms fail to teach their kids these basics...ugh)
I think my 6yo could make mac & cheese if he were allowed to use the stove...And he has run a load of laundry for me.
Seriously though, things that are second nature to me aren't for my husband. His mother didn't do a much training, (after all, its "womens work" eyeroll) but he had some basic knowledge when we got married--he could do laundry reasonably well. Last night I offered to bake cookies for him to take to his home teaching families. He was so grateful, "thank you so much, you really don't have to do this, that is a big job..." LOL.
He was floored when I told him that from start to the first batch out of the oven is only about 20 minutes. (actually I timed it this time... 16 minutes. 6 minutes to throw all the ingredients together, 2 minutes to slap them on a cookie sheet, and 8 minutes to bake) I said, "I really wasn't kidding when I tell you that most housework is mind-numbingly easy." He laughed, but I think its easy so we have intellectual resources to deal with the issues being a parent presents at us that take real, in depth though. We can work those things out while we scrub the tile in the bathroom with a toothbrush.
Some men are raised to be helpless by mothers who have such little self-respect that they don't allow the men/boys to help. I've heard women get defensive & upset when their husbands offer to do dishes-"if he does all my work, and its no longer my personal domain, then where's my self-worth?" Is the attitude.
It drives me nuts to find grown men who can't do basic household chores. Reminds me that I need to have my boys help me out more often.
It sounds like your calling is very stressful right now. I would have a hard time dealing with people like that.
Good luck with your friend. It sounds like her husband is a control freak. I hope something awful doesn't happen.
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