I am so angry

I have a friend. She was the first person that I met when I moved to Germany. She was a great friend the entire time I was there. Her husband is an @#$. I won't even go into the things that went on. My husband worked with both of them, and he told me that if it were me married to him that I would have divorced him a long time ago. He also refuses to go to counseling, and told my friend that if they couldn't work it out themselves that they should just get a divorce. (inside I think HOORAY!! but for some crazy reason she is still with this jerk)

We do have a little bit of a history between us. My friend came to my house after her jerk husband put her out of the apartment. He called after she had been there for a little while, and asked to talk to her. I asked if she wanted to talk to him, and she said no. So I told him that she didn't want to talk to him, and then hung up the phone. It was 11pm. He then kept calling and calling. I didn't answer the phone and just let it go to our machine. But he wasn't stopping. She finally answered and told him that he needed to stop because my son was sleeping. Oh, if he had woken up Andrew, I would have gone over to his place myself and kicked him......
He was mad at me because I wouldn't let him talk to her. I'm not going to force her to talk to someone she doesn't want to talk to.

My friend also happens to be LDS, or Mormon. He is not. He thought that I didn't like him because of the religion thing. Obviously he doesn't know me at all. I didn't like him because he was an ass. Plain and simple. (sorry for that word, but it has been dying to come out)

We left Germany about 3 weeks before they did. I had no way of contacting her at all for months. I finally got a number of someone that was still in Germany and got some info from her. I called her, and her husband told me that she wanted all of her correspondence from friends to be through email. Fine. Give me her email. I emailed and emailed, and never a response. Finally I tried to call her again and I got this as a text: Please communicate via email only. That is not something my friend would have said. It was totally this jerk of a husband. (please note I use jerk to replace any other lovely word that you can come up with.) So, I was pretty angry. I emailed some pretty angry emails asking her what was going on, did she just not want to communicate with me anymore? Finally called her again months later, and spoke to her. She had no idea about the email thing, and she told me that they didn't even have Internet at the house, and she wasn't able to get to the library. OK, obviously he totally lied to me.

As my previous posts says, I am working on my Christmas cards. I called her last week and left a message saying that I would like to get their address so that I could mail them a card, and I would love to talk to her. And that we were going to Fort Bragg. I said that if I didn't hear back I would call back next week sometime. So, earlier tonight, I called and left a message. Half an hour later, I got a text message to my home phone (with a robot voice talking) and it said something to the effect that she was aware of my messages and that she would contact me if she needs to or wants to. Something like that. I wish it had come to my cell so that I could quote it word for word.

I am so angry. Why can he not allow her to contact me? I have unlimited long distance on my land line phone, so I am happy to call people because it doesn't cost me anything extra. I have no idea if she even can call me. The cell phone number that I have says that the voice mail box is full, so I can't even leave her a message on that. The only thing that I can think of is that she has no idea that I've even called, and he is just trying to get me to stop calling.

I looked up where they are living (I hope the address is right). They live only about an hour from Fort Bragg. When I get there, I'm ready to drive out there, and sit outside until I see her and ask her what the hell is going on. I almost want to call them everyday and hope that she picks up.

I'm scared for her. I have no idea what is going on. I'm worried for her. I know she really wants this marriage to work. I have no idea what to do. But maybe next week I'll call again. He cannot control me, not will I allow him to dictate to me when and how often I can call my friend. That is up to her.

(I'm not looking for advice, just needed a place to get this all out of my system. I type much faster than I write, so rather than the journal, it ends up on my blog. If you do have some thoughts, you are welcome to comment. Just want to make sure ya'll understand why I'm posting this. And yes, I've already talked to Matt about it. He suggested that I do a stake out in front of her house. Which is pretty much what I described above. Maybe I shouldn't do anything......)